Wednesday, January 14, 2015

'Mind over bladder' and other mantras from the back alleys of pregnancy

Oh yes, I'm going there - and only because it's tried and tested. You can definitely train your mind to play control games with your bladder to enable a full nights sleep.  In three easy steps.

1. You re-inforce (to your bladder obvs) that you have in fact not had a drink for a few hours before bed.
2. You go one last time before you settle in.
3. And then you just ignore it. It works - it really does.

Until the unborn one delivers an almighty punch to your bladder whilst practicing his superman pose, just as you think you've made it through the night. But if that's at 6:43 am just before the alarm goes, as far as I'm concerned, I'm still winning.
I suspect my winning trajectory might start going downhill in the next few weeks but I'll keep you posted.

'I can do this if I try'

..because this is only problem #642 to overcome when one is pregnant. And I can still fit in any gap I want, IF I THINK I CAN. It's basically along the same 'strong mind' lines as the last mantra. Seriously though, is it really necessary to back a fat lady quite so far into the corner??

(In case you're  wondering I did successfully slide in and out of the car on this occasion.)

'Baby is going to arrive on...'

I regularly swing between thinking a few extra weeks of 'holiday' would be fun - no baby, lots of date nights, coffees with friends and general frivolity - and just really wanting to meet him (and be pain-free again).

My control freak nature likes to think I can decide though and so I have acquired raspberry leaf tea, dates, clary sage oil, and a ball to bounce on. You think I'm kidding but I'm 100% serious and will be trying all these and other tactics (did you know there is an accupressure point that will induce labour, plus I know where my local women and birth acupuncturist lives) to make sure we don't get induced at 40 weeks + 12 days. And in fact ensure labour starts at the very minute I want it to.

Such a fool am I. Good thing our good heavenly father has this sorted and baby will arrive when he wants and nothing I do will change that.

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