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Friday, September 19, 2014

Finding Out...



I know I have a funny memory. Really great with some things and totally hopeless with others. And though this is going back a few months now I know it will fly swiftly out of my head if I don't write.it.down. All that stuff about finding out we were pregnant, and then telling our families.

So like I said earlier, we decided to give this baby-making thing a serious go and no one tells you how much of a full time job it is. Keeping track of ovulation cycles and reading your body's very faint lines of communication and not thinking constantly about it. And then all the little dilemmas ...
Glass of wine with dinner? Or not?
Big pitcher of birthday Pimms? or not? (We may have gone with YES! on that one)
Salami and blue cheese? 
Pick up a heavy tripod case? And a camera? Or just the camera? Or neither? 
Indulge my special relationship with drugs? (of the anti-inflammatory, anti-histamine, caffeine, justgivemeapainkiller kind). Or just not?
Steer clear of all baby chat, (in case people thing we're trying obvs) or talk to people about pregnancy and babies all the time?

Ah, it's all good fun. Although not the sort of fun I'd like over an extended period of time if I'm honest. 

Anyway, I was in India, mainly for work with a sneaky little (read: amazing little) family time chucked in and my usually clockwork cycle was playing games and my friend Aunty Flo was AWOL. And you know how I was NOT thinking about it all the time. I was in fact going to ignore it. And wait all week till I was home with Steve before giving any baby thoughts even the tiniest bit of mind space. And that worked! All that mind power. And determination. For about two hours. 

And then the internal reasoning of the Arpi mind starts chatting loudly...
"You're about to head into the jungle to see the film crew. You and the imaginary baby could get eaten by a tiger and then what will Steve do. Or more importantly, gin and tonic with the guys? Lift aforementioned heavy cameras? Consume vast amounts of travel sickness tablets? Ahhh, you really should try and see what's going on. Not because you have a weak will power obviously, only for the sake of imaginary baby"

So off I went to the local chemist and bought a couple of pregnancy tests and waited till I had a full bladder and finally took the test. And a few unbearable nervous, excited seconds later there was a second line on the test. 
Positive. 
+ve. 
p.o.s.i.t.i.v.e.
It's a funny moment, one that you wait for and want so much and then don't quite know what to do with when it comes. And common who agrees that it's all a bit weird - you pee on a stick, and a pink line means baby. And that's ALL you have to go on. Like seriously, when was the last time your whole life was changed by a line on pee stick?! (No don't answer that if you've had a gazillion babies already.)
Anyway, I decided I was going to be rational, and not too excitable and just keep my little secret till I got home at the weekend and could tell Steve in some amazingly creative way, in person. Great plan. For about two hours. 
And then I got on Facetime to him and just had to show him the test and tell him that he was going to be a daddy. But that's life, we had a little laugh and a cry about it and it was still really special. 

And then, even though we weren't going to initially, we decided that there just wouldn't be another lovely chance to share with my parents in person. And so Steve told them, on facetime and it was SO wonderful to be in the room together and share hugs and tears and have them pray with us, for this tiny little life growing in me. And I got to tell my brother in person too, over a quick airport coffee in Mumbai and it was amazing. [Yes, we've turned into that family that just about manages some time in transit together although we're usually in about six different countries  simultaneously between the five of us. Who am I kidding, we've been that family for a long time now. And I kinda like it.]

Anyway, I was home a few days later and it was such a happy re-union. That evening we went round to Steve's sister's place saying we needed to see the babies. Lets be honest we feel like we always need Jack and Olivia cuddles. Who wouldn't?!! We had just a few minutes before Bec and Joe went out, and Steve's parents were in the room too. Steve was bouncing Olivia on his knee and chatting to her and says totally matter of factly 'So Livvy, we just came round to tell you that you're going to have a little cousin next year.' :D That three seconds of stunned silence whilst everyone worked things out was priceless. And it was another really joyful few minutes of celebrating with excited family. 
I've said before how grateful we are for our families and we wouldn't have done it any other way. We are so glad we told them early on because they were a real support and help in so many ways. And they were praying us through it all, and continue to do so. How blessed are we?!

People say you really shouldn't tell anyone till the end of the first trimester, and for the most part we didn't but we did share with a few close friends and again, have absolutely no regrets about it. They were all excited for us, and supportive and we know that they love this baby and will keep doing so in the same generous way they love this baby's parents. We do have wonderful community around us! 

Yikes - I'm sorry, that's turned into a bit of a saga, good thing no one actually reads this blog (hi pa!) or this length of post would put actual people off it. Until next time then!

p.s. If you hang around you might get lucky and have a few pictures of me and my mahoooosive belly. And we might might might tell you what flavour of baby we're having. Come on team blue/pink - show yourself! 

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